Maria Bailey said, “…the greatest thing you can gain from all this (blogging) community is earning the respect of your peers, and I think the way you earn that is through hard work and passion and demonstrating that passion to your peers…it’s through those partnerships that I think you grow and do well.”
Out of Maria’s entire one hour show, Maria Bailey LIVE! on MomTV (live every Sunday at 7pm CST) that was the one sentence that really struck a chord with me. While I *think* I have the respect of my peers, it’s the passion part I feel like I’m failing at.
I’m not passionate about writing.
I’m not passionate about marketing.
I’m not passionate about tweeting.
I’m not really even passionate about blogging.
Blogging Passions
What I am passionate about is being a mom and being apart of a virtual community of moms. Living the life of a stay at home mom can be quite lonesome. Play groups and swim classes just aren’t my thing. The one thing I feel has made my blog a success is the community I’ve surrounded myself with. Not the witty daily updates, not the snazzy graphics and definitely not my beaming personality (yes, that’s sarcasm). I love the connections having a blog brings me. Every time I write about my adventures in mommyhood, I get a comment or two “right there with ya girl”, “oh that just happened to me” or “I feel your pain, tomorrow will be better”. It’s in those moments when I feel like I’m not alone. There really ARE other moms (and dads) that know exactly what I’m going through at that very moment and are here to support me.
That is where I feel my success is…connecting with moms just like me.
Blog Events
I’m sure you’ve also noticed my blog isn’t entirely about being a “mom blogger”…there’s a sprinkle of product reviews, brand marketing and giveaways here and there. I’ve even been fortunate enough to be invited to a couple of blogger and brand expense paid trips, but was unable to attend. Why? Because I’m a mom. More importantly, a stay at home mom with three children. Life gets in the way, child care isn’t free, kids get sick, the list goes on and on and on.
This has brought up some feelings of failure lately, like I’m failing my blog in some strange way. Not being able to attend these events and blogging conferences like Blogher and TypeAMom makes me feel like I’ll never have the opportunity to really connect with my peers, or even worse, hold me back from being a successful blogger. I get the feeling there are many other mom bloggers feeling this way as well.
The truth is, you CAN be a successful blogger without all of the glitzy paid trips and blog conferences. I’ve had the opportunity to work with fabulous companies and brands like Fisher-Price, Office Max, Gerber and Huggies but the real success in blogging is the amazing connections I’ve made with blogging moms like Trisha, Kim, Tanya, Stefanie, Tricia and so many more.
So when you’re down and out while reading about the trips like the Nestle event going on this week or the past TypeAMom conference…remember that your real blogging successes are the friendships you’ve made…even if they are only virtual.
Success is what you make of it!
About Cat Davis
Cat you are so right! I feel so blessed to have the friendships I have from blogging~ Thanks for the reminder!
You put this so well. I am a mom first and foremost and as much as I’d love to attend a blogging conference to meet other mom bloggers, the needs of my children must come first. I cherish the online friends I’ve made and hope someday we will embrace in person rather than in mere ((((HUGS)))) but for now this is where I happily am.
I couldn’t agree more! As much as I really wanted to accept the invitation to Nestle this week…my kids come first. My husband can’t take time off of his training course to stay home with them and these events don’t allow for your kids to come with you…which is really odd. Host an event for MOMS but tell them to leave their children behind. uhhh I don’t think so.
Cat,
You’re right; again. I am passionate about writing, but I’m a wife and a mom. Taking up more of my time recently is as a homeschooling mom. I’ve accepted that I am a mom blogger and not a mom/business woman blogger. I don’t have the time nor the interest, which will forever keep me on the sidelines reading about the cool events that other mommies get to attend.
I enjoy documenting the experiences w/my children because as my memory goes (says my sister), the pictures and words may be all I have to remind me. Although I enjoy seeng the profitable successes of other mommies, my success will be determined by the “personal” connections I make w/other mommies. It’s nice to know that you’re not the only one out there and also the wealth of knowledge shared is so wonderful. I can’t imagine my life w/o the resources other mommies provide. Cat, you’re definitely one of them!
Girl, you always making me all teary eyed. I know I don’t say this enough…but I really am lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful women like you!
Well said Cat. I blog as a hobby not as a job. I would never have the time for all that. I am not sure that’s a good thing or a bad thing but that is how it is.
Most people really connect with those who blog as a hobby. We understand and empathize with limited time for everything, childcare restrictions and watching the expenses.
you do have a great blog and i enjoy reading it daily. a contest brought me here but your posts will keep me comming back!! you can do it!
i am a sahm also and since we don’t work and don’t have a baby sitter, our kids go everywhere with us… i have had my daughter sit in my lap while i was the patient at the dentist more than once. not fun, but hey, it’s my job!
I know how you feel. There are days when I get down on myself because I feel like I’m not doing enough for my blog. But I have to remind myself that I’m a mom first and a blogger later. Whatever will be will be but in the meantime I do enjoy blogging but even more making friends like you and all the other wonderful women that we are friends with. To me community and friendships are more important than blogging functions that many of us are not fortunate enough to attend. Although, if they ever have one in St. Louis then we can go together and make arrangements way in advance!
I love this post Cat! It really is more about the people and the connections we’re making – friendships to hopefully last a lifetime!
you know cat, its funny cause Im not a writer either. All over Type A they were talking about how blgging IS writing, etc. but I am not a writer. At the very best, I am entertainment, kwim?
But you are right, i come on for the friendships. Without them, I would just wouldnt be here.
trisha
Ah, you are so right…..Honestly, I don’t get all bent out of shape about these blogging events. I adore the connections that I have made with my lil ol’ blog. I don’t need the lights, camera or action (Ok, I lie….I do need it but if I don’t ever get it. So be it.) I will move on to the next thing : )~
I mean, I have three kids at home and husband with crazy work hours. There would be no way for me to hop on a plane and travel cross the country at the drop of a hat. Does that mean I am less of a blogger……I hope not!
((hugs))
I was not able to attend Blogher or Type A. It did make me feel “out of the loop”. After reading your post, I stepped back and looked at all of the great connections that I have made with bloggers, reader and brands.
Before I found blogging I had a few online communities that share’d my like interestes. Infertility being my first search for answers. I found many friends who suffered like I did, and we still remain friends til this very day.
Now that I found blogging to help me in my family shortcomings, frustrations, aggravations, accomplishments and Fun I too have met many women in my circle of madness. Some how crawling out of Postpartum Depression blogging and visiting blogs has renewed me! The friendships that I found in you, and many others has saved my sanity. WIsh you’s I don’t know where or what I Would of done. OK now I cant see. These damn tears are blocking my vision. ONE day this {{{HUGS}}} will be real even though we live miles apart 1 day my friend I’ll give you that hug you so deserve.
Thanks for being YOU!
Hello! I am new to this amazing blogging world, but I just stumbled across your site and I love it! Also, your post made me feel so much better about being the ‘new girl’ on the block as I felt like everyone already had their blog cliques and I am just blogging to myself as I don’t think anyone’s ever even visited my site, but hopefully I will be able to meet some new friends here and form wonderful friendships like you all have. So with that said — hello ladies, my name is Katie!
Cat , like you I don’t think I would ever be able to attend those conventions , meet ups ! I have 4 young babies still home and they need me 24 -7 , just like yours do! I’m glad you posted this , I was beginning to think that I would never get up there like you , Kim, Tanya, Stefanie, and all the other Momdotters. Now I have faith that in time I just might do it ! Great post Cat!
I just started my blog and I totally agree! It brings me so much joy to read the comments I get on my blog from people I don’t even know. All so supportive and exciting! It is so interesting to me to read about blog conferences, etc for Stay at Home Moms. I didn’t even know they even existed. I think I have a lot to learn!
Success in something means accomplishing your goal. To be a successful blogger means accomplishing what you want with it, not what others want. I measure my success by whether or not just one post has helped one mom. If it has, than I have accomplished my goal.
I love friendships I make trough the blogging. And those bloggy friends are the reason I blog every day
I’ve gone on some trips and events and it ain’t all rainbows and lollipops. I put myself through the inconvenience a few times to “get my big break”. Now I got a taste of it, I’m chilling out at home unless I really feel I can benefit from the travel and it doesn’t conflict with home. I just can’t do one day trips and constant flying.
I can certainly understand that. I honestly don’t know how these bloggers do it that go on frequent trips especially with young children. I guess I just wish companies would be more understanding of the fact that most of us are stay at home moms with no child care budget.
It is so hard to just get up go on trips. The only reason I have been able to is because Hubby is home. But when he goes back to work I wont be able to go on trips.
I just wanted to comment and say this post made me feel less of a newbie and more of a just arrived at the party and ready to embrace all the new friends I will make and if something good comes out of then so be it. A very well written blog from what I can read.
i too am passionate about writing! it is the stress release point of my day.